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May 9, 2013
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"Father?
Dad?
Where are you?
Dad...?
Dad !!!!!!!"

Lightning pierces the darkening sky
as rain continues to pour.
But above the thunderous storm could be heard
the sobs of a little girl all alone.

Drenched in her own pool of tears...
her heart torn and bruised.
Her swollen eyes lifts towards the sky...
as her minds drifts...drifts above it all...

" Wake up, my love.
wake up!
Daddy is here.
"
"Dad?"

Her eyes lit up
as she runs into his arm.
Unable to contain her joy
her heart burst with excitement and laughter.

"Why are you laughing? "
"Cause you're here!
I'm so happy you're here!"
"I am happy as well. "

He lifts her up.
Holds her closer than he has ever done.
"Look my dear.
the sky is all clear now...
"

'It is?'
"Yes.
Now we can do all those stuff you planned.
Remember?
"

"Now we can go to the movies together.
Now we can walk in the park, while i hold you close.
Now we could go bike riding together
we could even make something together for your mother.

You'll like that wont you?
Now we can look forward to the father-daughter dance at grad.
I'll have to start taking dance lessons,
your mom will kill me if i step on your toes...
"

'We're gonna have the greatest time dad.'
"Yes we shall.
You'll always be my little girl...
and you know i'll always be there for you...

I'll protect you always.
i'll wipe your tears when you're sad.
i'll hold you in my arms and keep you safe.
i'll handle any boy that dares hurt you.


'Dad!!!...
just don't hurt them tooooo much, ok?'
"I wont...i'll just make sure they know
that whoever messes with my daughter messes with me!
"

'Nothing can separate us...
right dad?'
"You'll always be my little girl...
and i'll always be your dad...
"

Her heart overflows with love and joy as she closes her eyes...
and smiles, as he cradles her head in his chest.
"This is the best day ever dad..."
"Dad?"

A thunderous sound fills the air.
She opens her eyes only to be blinded
by a raging flash of lightning.
She could hear it...

She could hear the rain banging the rooftop.
She could feel the thunder rattling her bones...
but even more dreadful...
she could no longer feel her dad's embrace...

"Dad!!!!
Dad where are you ?!!"
She screamed and shouted at the top of her lungs
but the storm drowned it all out.

She sank back to the floor...
tears streaming down her face once again.
Another burst of lightning pierced the air
followed by a crashing sound...

The whole house was enveloped in darkness.
Her bedroom door swung open as her mother rushed in.
"I'm so glad you're alright my dear...
what's....what's wrong?"

"Where's dad...where's dad, mom?"
"O honey, daddy left many years ago..."
"Will I ever see him again?"
"I don't know honey, but we can dream..."
this poem was originally written for a contest where i had to show how things would be sifferent if a particular event had not occured...


the poem itself/setting etc. is fictional but inspired from my own life. My father left me when i very young and has never returned, hence i'm growing up without his physical presence....but he is still alive so there is still some hope i'll meet him. but had he not left when he did things would be different....hence some parts of the poem...


i hope you guys understood it...
it's been a while since i wrote and submitted a poem (though i love poetry {as well as other art forms}) :D

feel free to comment and tell me what you guys think :D
i LOVE getting comments :p

Thanks for reading
-Deanjeno
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:iconbryosgirl:
bryosgirl Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I hope you don't mind me drawing comparisons with your other works, but this is precisely what I was talking about in "I Am Not Dead" about narrative poems. Granted, it concludes on an open-ended note, but this poem tells a story, even if it's within the confines of a dream or "what if" verse and incorporates a degree of setting, conflict, characterization, etc. It would have been nice to see more incorporation of setting and sensory details to break up the character-driven aspects, but as a whimsical journey it works.

A note on naming, there were a number of times when "dad" should have been capitalized. When in doubt as to whether it should be capitalized or not, the easiest thing to remember is to ask yourself if it is someone calling another by that name. For example "We're gonna have the greatest time dad."  In this case you would capitalize it because "Dad" is being used as a proper noun. However later on in, "she could no longer feel her dad's embrace..." it would remain in lower case, as 'dad' is not being used as a title or name.

The story itself is indeed quite sad. Although my dad & mom are together, he wasn't around a lot because of work, so I was really able to relate to some degree with the narrator on missed experiences and the like. I think really the subject is something anybody who missed out in an important relationship (be it a friend, family member, lost lover, etc.,) could connect to on some level.
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:iconspiderwebwisher:
SpiderwebWisher Featured By Owner Sep 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm crying on the inside. I'm not gonna cry, I'm not gonna cry! I failed. 
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:iconblaumoond:
blaumoond Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2013
it's upsetting but also tuching ina sad way
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:iconkrissy-kitten:
Krissy-Kitten Featured By Owner May 13, 2013
This really hits home for me...It's very sad, but I love the emotion in it, and the transition from fear, to relief, to reality. At least, that's the way I look at it.
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:iconreverand-tom:
Reverand-Tom Featured By Owner May 10, 2013
This is excellent. It reminds me of a friend I have in Senegal who lost both of her parents a few years ago in her home country of Liberia. They were killed in rebel attacks. She knows Christ as her Savior, but it has been hard on her as she is a refugee in Senegal. I am her official trustee in her estate in which we are trying to get hold of. Pray for us in getting this finished.
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:iconmonsterintheshadows:
Monsterintheshadows Featured By Owner May 9, 2013
This is really great
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:iconvampeer1:
vampeer1 Featured By Owner May 9, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
very good and interesting despite it's sadness!
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